Category: Teen Topics
Anyone ever get those punishments that are obviously not fair? Like, for example, you stay out too late one night, and then get grounded for a month? I hate those. Also, when you get your first boyfriend or girlfriend, and your parents think he or she is a jerk when they hardly know the person.
There's a reason I was quite happy to move several states away from mine at age 18.
yeah. I will be doing the same thing when I turn eighteen in June, provided I can get the money.
yes for far away college! *counts down the days*
I'm excited about college already.
I think we all find our parents annoying. lol I know i find my mom very ... well, annoying doesn't cover it. i find her ethod of punishment unacceptable. She's basically left me emotionally scarred for the rest of my life, and i can't forgive her unless she acknowledges she was wrong, and she actually, hwholeheartedly apologizes. not likely.
I guess I'm in the minority here. I love my parents. I mean sure they are unreasonable at times. When they lecture, they just go on and on and it drives me nuts. And their rules seemed so unreasonable. I know if I were to move far away, I'd miss them like crazy. Hell. I'm in the same town and I still tell my man I miss my parents even though they're a five minute drive away. But I love them so much. Granted, I'm 22 right now so I don't know if it makes a difference. lol But I was a teen once and can remember how annoying my parents were. Some parent-child relationships never seem to work out no matter how old you get but I am glad that I can find it very easy to talk with my parents. Some of my sybblings don't even know how to communicate with my parents which I think is so sad. So don't rule out your parents all together cause someday, you'll be one too.
Well I agree with Michelle, I mean, I love my parents, and I would miss them, but I get sick of them. I mean my parents and I have a good relationship, but I want to move out sometimes, cause it's to crazy at my house.
oh, i think we all get annoyed, mad, furious, pissed, anything like that. but you do ahve to give your parents credit too, they might seem unreasonable and everything, but its for your own good. sometimes, my mom and i fight like cats and dogs, but still. i love her to death. and i know that what she's trying to do is to help me, so yeah. but yes, i do get annoyed with my mommy. her rules and her expectations are just too much sometimes
Why is it that so many parents are abusive, and so many more are at least incredibly unfair. This includes mine at times. I mean, does this indicate that we're all going to turn out as bad as our parents when we become parents ourselves? Or is this one single generation in which our parents were born the reason for this. I really have to wonder. I can't tell you how many times I've been on phone systems, online communities such as this one, and other such systems, and seen people talk about how bad their parents are. I rarely see people who honestly don't have a huge amount of issues with their parents. Personally, mine tend to make unfair rules sometimes, but usually there are reasons. For example, not making too much noise past a certain time is fair, because our two rooms are separated by an inch thick wall, and if I make any noise beyond a whisper or quiet music, it can be heard clearly in the next room. it's a pain in the neck, but hopefully we'll be moving soon. My mother is the one that mainly goes off at me for something stupid, usually something I can't help either. She has screamed at me over the smallest things, and refuses to acknowledge that some things are her own fault. This is probably what bothers me the most. But, it's not abusive or anything. I used to think that I got the short end of the stick, but now when looking at things like this, I see that i really didn't. I mean, at least neither of my parents go out and get drunk and then abuse me or each other, or anything lik ethat. For the most part I get along with them.
adendum:
was going to go down a line, but for some reason forms mode turned off and it posted itself.
There are some really good things about my parents, for example. They do give me an allowance, I have my own phone line which they pay for for the most part, and they usually let me do whatever I want. Sometimes one or both of them will even help with homework and such.
My opinion is, not everyone is perfect, including parents, and although I think that my mother has some things that she could possibly work on, for the most part she is ok.
now, let's see if this will post.
yep. I think it posted both times. just different words. Anyway, some rules are reasonable. I understand that. I remember when I was about ten years old, and I had to go to bed at 8:30. That was my bed time, and I thought it was so unfair then, but now I understand why it was 8:30. Of course, I'm a bit older now, and can make my own decisions about when to go to bed on schoolnights. Still, there are some rules I just can't understand. hmm...trying to think of one. Well, I guess I have it well compared to some people. I've heard of some kids who literally have an hour of TV a day, or they're never allowed to have any friends over, and they're not allowed to date as long as they're living under their parents' roof.
Yeah, I’m pretty sure most of our parents can be annoying most of the time, but they just mean well. I know I felt annoyed toward my parents so many times, but I think, its better that they reprimand you or discipline you for your actions. It just means that they care about you. I know sometimes it gets too much, but at least, they take the time to notice you. I know its not always for the right reasons but its their way of showing you that they care about you. There is lots of reasons why misunderstandings between parents and teenagers occur all the time. I think one of it is the lack of communication, mistrust, culture, and generational gap. I know I’ve done lots of good and bad things during the time I was living with my parents, but all they tell me is that I never listen to them. I get straight A’s and they will just pass by me and not say anything. I come home late from a party, and they get really pissed. I told them what time I was going home. I think sometimes, it’s too much, hey, you got to understand, they wasted a lot of time working just to provide you with what you have, and if you don’t realize those things then you don’t know how to appreciate the effort that they do for you. I know some friends of mine that don’t have parents or moved out immediately after high school. If that’s what you want go for it, but just a reminder be prepared, save some money, get a job, have yourself a stable income, and prepare to take responsibility for everything. If after taking all these reminders into consideration just make sure that you will try to not ask them for help when you run out of cash. Having a place of your own, paying for your college education, and having some other additional expenses (basic necessities, electric and water bills, phone bills) is not easy. You have to pay dues on time, you have to make sure that you maintain a good credit record, and you got to make sure that on top of all these expenses, you still have some cash left on your savings account. I know its great to be in control of your life, and have the independence to do what you want, but before you conclude that your parents totally annoy you. Think again, take advantage of your time with them, and think of all the good things they did for you.
well said.
I love both of my parents, and I know they mean well, but sometimes they drive me up a wall! They are telling me to go to this college and that I can't go to any other college, or they ask for my passwords to my computer and email, or they want to know all the gossip and all of my personal business. We do have a right to keep those things quiet, but obviously they don't understand that! These are just examples.
Macy
I have never had that problem with my mom.
You name it, I have a whole host of problems with my single mum. She's still in control of me to a far greater extent than I like, while I'm still living at home, age nearly 26. don't do this, don't do that, don't do the other, don't do diddly squat! The latest thing being we ain't having a Rottie if we do get another dog! Aw'w'w'w'w'w'w!She says I'm unreliable and would just disappear soon as she went out to work, that I wouldn't let the dog outside during the day and I wouldn't walk it. Now, this simply, wouldn't be the case. I know that would be grossly unfair on the dog if I were to just open the french window for 5 minutes at 6 AM, then disappear till 2 PM, lol, I'd just use my brain cells and never do that again once we finally did get a dog. As for walking it, well, I'm housebound thanks to a totally shite association for the blind where I live, so that would mean mum and I taking the dog out for an hour or two in the evening during the week, put some neutral ground between us and this godforsaken hole we live in so the fighting, stops, even if it's just for an hour a day during the week and two or even three hours a day at weekends. That's how we'd manage if we took on a dog with mum still at work. I'd have another form of exercise under my belt, one which I'd enjoy doing, especially with the involvement of a dog, I'd have a bloody good reason, not, to disappear, I'd have a reason to get out of bed and enjoy the best part of the morning as well as the afternoon. I always, set an alarm if I know I need to get up for hospital or other appointments and stuff, so mother, what is your f***ing problem, b****! Gur'r'r'r'r'r'r'r'r'r'r'r! I lie in when I want to and try to fall out of bed when I want to as well, but I would get up at a reasonable time if there was a fantastically, good reason for doing so, EG, taking on a dog, but that has always, been one of mum's bugbears! Unless she is out of the house, I don't get even an hour's space and time to myself during the day. At this moment and time, I'd give anything at all, to just put 150 miles minimum, between us. There's a reason why I just want to empty my whole savings account in to a very lucky landlord's hand up north and rent a decent pad privately, and, have the dog I want, not the one mum would choose for us.
Jen.
Jen.
i hate my parents, that's that. they've messed up my life so thanks to them
They really use to be, it wasn’t annoying, but mentally painful, but things has gone loads better. No more shouting, no more concealments, they are more willing to reason, and be kinder. The Asian culture is hard to deal with, but I’ve learnt, that one should make the world better by being kind.
I’ve made it my job to study parenting, parenting communications, and relationships. I’ve think I have some idea how different I should be with kids. Not completely loose, but not so tight up and instead of shouting and being loud be smart, persuasive, gentle, smooth, and manipulative. I’ve discover for the most part the problem is that people can’t deal with one another, and more so this generation, but I’ve certainly taken the time to sit down and learn to be a much better person. Many people want me to run things, and I find that I am good at it, due to my parents and how unreasonable they are, and I’ve taken that and looked at how I should do differently.
An update for you all: There are still things to this day that I will not understand about my parents, just as there are things they will never understand about me, but I find that for the most part, we're on the same page. I'm moving out soon, and I'm glad to say I'm leaving here on good terms. I still think that both my parents, at some point or another, have abused their power, but I think their intentions were good.
The only thing I could still rant about is the fact that some parents think: If you're not contributing financially, you have no rights in the household beyond basic rights, food, shelter, water, a bed to sleep on, sanitary supplies. Other than that, the financial contributers have all the say. To some degree, I agree with this, because little things we do can affect the bills, but I also strongly believe that there is a fine line between this and overpowering.
Children may not contribute financially, but they go to school, usually do homework, and do chores in most homes. Tell me how this isn't contributing to the home.
Anyway, like I said, I haven't had this issue much lately, but it always bothers me how some parents think they can do or say whatever they want whenever they want because they are the parent.
Amen to the last poster! My mother is like that. She thinks that because my siblings and I don't contribute financially that she can talk to us any kind of way. She is verbally and emotionally abusive, and sometimes it is just absolutely unbearable. Some other people may say there parents mean well, but I know my mother only does it out of selfishness. I don't care how many things she buys for me, I hate her with a burning passion. She deserves and can buy no love or respect from me. She is an inconsiderate, coldhearted bitch, and it doesn't help that she's bipolar on top of all that. I really can't wait to move out. I will miss my father and brother, and loathe the bitch forever! I don't understand why I ended up with the wicked witch of the west crossed with an idiot for a mother. She can dish out all kinds of abuse and behavior, but then she can't take it when someone points out that she's a hypocrite. She just thinks she's queen of heaven, hell, and earth, and that she has the last say in everything. She considers any spoken response to her orders besides "Yes ma'am" is talking back. There is just no compromising with her, she is a lost cause. She considers her own children to be as low as scum, and puts just about everything else in her life before us. I can't wait till she dies, and I mean it.
My father on the other hand is an amazing parent. He is very calm and likes to talk things through when there is a misunderstanding. My dad is willing to do whatever for us whenever he can do it. I love him because he takes our feelings into consideration. He knows how to maintain his status as parent without seeming as a friend or an enemy. If any of us does or gets involved in something wrong, we know to turn to him because he will not blow up in our face like we are the worst people on the planet.
Okay, I think I'm done. I should have created a thread on the rant board, but I really had to get that off my chest.
I suppose I should have created this topic on the rant board, but it seemed to fit in with teen topics. *smiles*. To the last poster, good luck with everything.
I am soooooooooooo glad I technically don't live with my parents and that I go to the Blind school in Austin Texas.
Yes, it is extremely hard, especially being blind. It wasn't until I moved away that my parents realized I wasn't a child. You guys will get through it.
Raven, boy can I relate to every statement about your mom; my birth canal is the same way. my bio dad wants nothing to do with me either, but thankfully I'm with an aunt and uncle who truly love me...and aren't abusive. FYI, I'm 22 now, and would never welcome my birth canal into my heart again after how she treated me. I've certainly learned to make the most of life, but never again will I allow myself to be hurt by her or anyone else for that matter who has proven themselves unworthy.
Good luck with everything!
Macy